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Guest Article

Ritual

June 30, 2023

Satanic Unbaptism Ritual

A collective ritual magic guide for non-theists & materialists

[Zine]

Unbaptism rituals can be healing especially for people who’d like to consciously and actively undo something done to them without their assent or that they were too young to really consent to.

The good news is you can just do that! Sit down with each other, talk about what specifically you want to renounce, whether you want to incorporate fire instead of water, hail Satan or just curse God. Unbaptize yourselves.

It’s all made up, and the cool thing is you get to make stuff up, too. It can be private, with a chosen audience, or in full public.

What follows is one unbaptism ritual. There are many other examples, but this is theatrical while still having a lower level of demand than some others, and therefore it might be something that you adapt can for your needs more easily. Or, it could be something you hate so much it helps you realize what you want and inspires you to make something new. Whichever!

This is based on a script of non-theists/atheist types doing a ritual. Change, excise, and keep anything that feels right to you to do so, including the number of people involved. The important thing to remember is that all of this stuff was made up by Someone (or more likely, lots of Someones) just more or less recently and reinterpreted and adapted more or fewer times.

The only advice we’d give as far as guidelines for a specifically Satanist unbaptism ritual is: “embrace the cringe”; it’s fine, and that’s honestly part of the fun.

See if you can find sincerity in your ritual rather than worrying about how cool or silly it appears to others because that is likely to be how participants get the most value out of it.


MATERIALS NEEDED

  • Baptism certificates (or stand-ins)
  • easily-cut cord
  • knife to cut cord
  • fire/bowl to collect destroyed certificates for later burning
  • Bell (or gong or suitable noise instrument)
  • Index cards (if people don’t have time to memorize their lines)

PARTICIPANTS

  • Unbaptizee(s)
  • Clergy (four total)
  • Witnesses

RITUAL SCRIPT

Witnesses gather in a circle around Clergy, Unbapitzee(s), and a fire or brazier. Witnesses hold candles. Candles are lit counter-clockwise around the circle.

Clergy 1 rings bell.

Clergy 1:

“Ave Satanas. Let us witness. Hail Satan! Let us begin.”

Clergy 2:

“O Satan! the Most Beneficent.
O Devil! Desire’s friend.
O Lucifer! First of Rebels,
Naked-Power’s Clever Foe,
God-Enemy Eternal, Implacable, Unconquered,
Everlasting Seat-of-Spite.

O Satan! Omnipotence-insurgent,
let Us be as You are in Myth
let us become like You in Legend:

that We too may live as We Desire,
that We too may live Free from Shame,
that We too may live Free from Dogma
from the Domination of the Living
and Tyranny of the Dead,
that We too may be Alive,
Guided by Justice, Liberty, and Compassion,
Inspired to shatter all Fetters,
Led forward by our own Unconquerable Will.”

Clergy 3 brandishes baptism certificate at Unbaptizees.

Clergy 3:

“Behold the baleful contract that has bound you.”

All Clergy wrap cords around the wrists of the Unbapitzees.

Clergy 4:

“These [bindings] represent your baptism into the misguided faith that would shackle your understanding, your growth and your freedom. You may make your personal declarations at this time.”

Unbapitzee(s), one by one:

[Optional personal declaration about baptism and circumstances of own religious trauma..]

Clergy 1:

“Baptism offers false salvation on behalf of an abuser-god. But we—as flawed humans looking for our own answers—have within us all that is necessary to liberate ourselves from repugnant superstitions and misplaced guilts. Let us break the chains that have held us back.”

Clergy 2 raises knife.

Clergy 2:

“Do you believe in yourself, the only sovereign power over your own life?”

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

“Do you believe in the carnal bliss afforded to you by your natural desires?”

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

“Do you believe the only salvation to be found is within your ability to achieve for yourself through knowledge, action, and community?”

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

“Now: Do you reject ‘God’, petty and cosmic tyrant?”

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

“Do you reject ‘Christ’, self-serving martyr to nothing?

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

Do you reject the Holy Spirit; do you blaspheme it and renounce all false hope it offers?

Unbaptizee(s):

“I do.”

Clergy 2:

“Do you reject your baptism forever?” (3x)

Unbapitzee(s):

“I do.” (3x)

Clergy all cut away cords from wrists of Unbapitzee(s).

Clergy 4:

“Then witness! your bonds are cut away and your baptism is rejected and dissolved.”

Clergy 3:

“Now witness: this contract has no power over you. Destroy it and your bonds now in flames of Lucifer the Light-Bringer.”

Unbaptizee tears up and throws baptism certificate and bonds into fire.

Clergy 2:

“You are no longer part of a slaver faith, crushed by conformity and forced to bow before an abuser-god. Your power is now your own. Your glory is your own. Your new life is your own. Enjoy it.”

Clergy 1:

“It is done.”

Clergy 1 rings bell.

Clergy 1:

“HAIL SATAN!

All witnesses, clergy, and Unbapitzee:

“HAIL SATAN!

Clergy 1 (louder):

“HAIL SATAN!

All witnesses, clergy, and Unbapitzee (louder):

“HAIL SATAN!

Clergy 1 (shouting):

“HAIL SATAN!

All witnesses, clergy, and Unbapitzee (shouting):

“HAIL SATAN!

Clergy 1 rings bell.

Clergy 1 (speaking normally):

“It is witnessed and it is done. Ave Satanas.”

Unbaptizee(s) receives embraces from everyone in the circle.

END RITUAL

_____________

TEXT FOR CERTIFICATES

Baptism certificate stand-in text (this certificate should be filled in and used when Unbaptizee doesn’t already have a baptism certificate for burning):

This certifies that [name] was baptized into the faith of [religious sect or church name] in or around [year].

Unbaptism certificate text:

This is to certify that [Name] has been unbaptized as of [day] of [month] in the year [specific year] by the power and authority of [whatever entity or principle]. All bonds of servitude are severed. Power and agency are restored to the self from this day forward. [Unbaptizee signs] Signed and witnessed by [Clergy and/or witness]

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